Long Crawl

Vicarious – tool

Eye on the TV
’cause tragedy thrills me
Whatever flavor it happens to be

Like:
“Killed by the husband” …
“Drowned by the ocean” …
“Shot by his own son” …
“She used a poison in his tea,
Then (she) kissed him goodbye”
That’s my kind of story
It’s no fun til someone dies.

Don’t look me at like I am a monster
Frown out your one face, but with the other (you)
Stare like a junkie into the TV
Stare like a zombie while the mother holds her child,
Watches him die,
Hands to the sky cryin “why, oh why?”

Cause I need to watch things die from a distance
Vicariously, I live while the whole world dies
You all need it too – don’t lie.

Why can’t we just admit it?
Why can’t we just admit it?
We won’t give pause until the blood is flowin’
Neither the brave nor bold
Nor brightest of stories told
We won’t give pause until the blood is flowin’

I need to watch things die from a good safe distance
Vicariously, I live while the whole world dies
You all feel the same so why can’t we just admit it?

Blood like rain fallin’ down
Drum on grave and ground

Part vampire, part warrior,
Carnivore and voyeur
Stare at the transmittal.
Sing to the death rattle.

Credulous at best
Your desire to believe in
Angels in the hearts of men.
But pull your head on out (of) your hippie haze
And give a listen
Shouldn’t have to say it all again

The universe is hostile
So impersonal
Devour to survive
So it is, so it’s always been …

We all feed on tragedy.
It’s like blood to a vampire.

Vicariously, I live while the whole world dies
Much better you than I.

found a new love to music… its been so long since i heard anything new.. just getting bored of tiesto’s podcasts and the long wait for my fav artists’ albums to come out…

well, its been a long time since i did anything new.. it always used to be the same old shit, diff day… yesterday was awesome.. got to hang out with stevie, andrew and dom-is-serious… had an awesome guitar jammin session… good to let the fingers loose on the fretboard once more with others.. i’m just slowly getting my life back and its been feeling better than ever… Melbourne has given me alot of ups and downs, but there’s always something here that makes me feel that my life will always get better and better…

i came out to my balcony yesterday, saw the most amazing view ever since i got here..

the rain scrolled slowly from the left…

well.., got more activities coming up… just remember, if you’ve hit rock bottom, there’s no where to go but up…

-Malcolm

New chapter…

wow.. it has been pretty fuckin long since my last post… more than a year…

well, many changes have happened… a failed relationship, a broken friendship.. looks like my social management is going down the tubes, which is funny coz i’ve been meeting tons of new people… never the less, this is about fresh beginnings!

i kinda miss staying alone… just having your friends over once in a while and all the time to myself… now its just a bit too crowded and awkward… living with your ex isn’t exactly the best thing to do… should have listened to others when they told me not to let her move in… well, i can still only blame myself…

hmm… whats been going on in Malcolm’s life the past 12 months?

1. got a sick new bike to thrash around in!!

2. got hospitalized for thrashing around on a bike…

3. got some neat new scars on the leg from the operation!

4. went back to uni…

5. uni sucks ass…

6. met a whole new bunch of people…

7. been doing random road trips to the mountains every once in a while..

8. liberation…!!!!

9. single life sets in… only a matter of time till i start to like it..

10. i like it already!

11. victorian downhill series starts soon… its time to train up!!

12. mmmm starting to like this other girl hehehehe…

well, short update… i’ll post more up again once more events start happening!!!

-Malness

:|!!!

mmm….. i likes…

-Malness

holidays??

Alrighty then…

So it was back to singapore again for my semester break.. quite pissed with it because i missed a whole fuckin month of winter… god, i miss the cold..

well, like you all already knew, singapore sucked.. dragged to see shit movies, hardly did anything anywhere.. but my girlfriend came down so i felt alot better… went to visit my grandma.. she’s not doing too well with the cancer and all.. i juts hope she lives till i get back to see her again for the last time…

and there she is.. miss you always ah mah..

ANYWAYSS…. sad stories apart, i went up to kl to see the guys!! and live with my one and only of course.. times were different… no one was free enough to come hang.. even daniel took alot of persuasion to come along.. bastard wasted my breath.. almost got really angry at him..

at least he wasn’t such a dick to not show up at all… thanks dude…! but you are a dick for getting me drunk…

mel came along too..! called her out coz my gf wanted to see her and we all haven’t hung out in ages anyways…

seriously, there were too many cameras out and they didn’t know which one to look at… oh well, screw it, they were prolly both staring at daniel.. and i don’t blame them..

afterwards, we went to daniel’s place to chill out for a while and check out his GLITTERY STUDIOUS STUDIO..

i have to say kiddo, you’ve done well with your life.. remember the little pple once you’ve become successful.. YOU’D FUCKIN BETTER!

so after all the short visits, the gf and i headed out to phuket! holiday under the sun! sun burns, food poisoning and tourist traps here i come!!

Phuket…. ergh…

i have to say… its been a long time since i went on a beach holiday.. damn, my parents were still together the last time we went on one.. which was back in 1998 or some shit when i was like 12… god… so we took a 1h flight from LCCT airport which is the budget terminal in kl… was hilarious.. some lebanese woman wanted to take an empty chair beside us and said “THIS IS NO??” i just wanted to laugh in her face and say “no.. this is not.. but it will be if you spoke proper english bitch…”

the flight was ok.. managed to get some shut eye coz the night before we didn’t really get much sleep… getting home from daniel’s at like 3 and packin and watching some ROBOT CHIKEN… the moment we got on, i almost passed out from the tiredness…

after we reached the airport, we just pretty much hung around and looked for a cab… after finding one, the cabbie took us to some lil road side office and we booked a snorkeling/island hopping trip arnd the coast.. god what a mistake that was… spent the entire day trying to buy ourselves into the idea that it would not suck.. well, read on and you’ll see how it went!

worse thing was on the way to the hotel, IT STARTED TO FUCKING RAIN… so much for tanning the moment we got there..

THANK FUCKING GOD!! our hotel rooms weren’t bad at all..

hotel!

had a little chuckle when i saw the beach towels.. bad english rules this country… hilarious…

nice try…

after getting orientated around the place, we just pretty much went out for dinner and braced ourselves for the next day!!! TIME TO TAN… mmmmmm… crispy brown…

here’s my beautiful baby out with me for dinner on our first night there!! FYI this trip was to mark our first year together…!

ok… i’m throughly nackered now.. i’m gonna cook some food then i’ll gonna go hang out with sean and the guys.. phuket part 2 coming up! oh, Krystal’s blog has some of our phuket stuff too… hit her up (BUT DON’T FUCKING HIT ON HER) at www.princessofrandomness.wordpress.com … piece aout!

-Malness..

julian’s sister

holy jesus…

ahh okok… i’m in alot of pain right now… too much laughing is seriously not healthy…

last night, we were hanging out at Prince of Wales bar (POW) which used to be a place where stevie and julian worked. so we were all there, julian’s fam and stevie’s fam and me, and we were just hanging out there catching up and talking shit along the way..

we went for a pretty decent dinner after and just hung out some more at the hawker.. later jew’s sister decides that stevie should bring the bottles of JD over to her place and all chill with her and her mom and teh jew..

anyways, so stevie always thought he had a chance to fuck his sister.. and the other guy who came, alex, is a scotsman who works at the bar with them, just likes to poke fun at julian and irritate the shit out of him.. last night was basically us making fun of julian all night and the more they drank, the more pissed julian would get..

the jokes went something like this..

julian : aye you fucker… you’re just a sick bastard who keeps trying to look up my sister’s skirt all night…

alex : i resent that.. i’m a gentleman… i would do no such thing… i was trying to look down her dress…

julian : put your hands up for jesus!

alex: i would put my stuff into your sister for nothing!

god.. there was so much more but i was so fucked up and sickly last night to remember.. i’m sure they will come back to me soon…

in anywhichcase… for the better part of the night, i was just hanging out with julian, his mom and his sister and alex and stevie, talking about film and music.. oh righty ho… julian’s sister just lost all bodily control… she broke 1 glass and a tower fo glass candle holders… it was hilarious how her mother was ripping on her all night as well.. giving annoying comments directed at her like “careful nour, its made of glass..” or when she hears a loud noise of some sort “nour, are you holding something?” oh, nour is jew’s sister btw…

well, i’m sure more shit will happen again tonight.. might be going to watch teh Zohan tonight with stev… jew’s being a broke ass and not coming..

PICTURES WILL BE COMING SOOON!!!!!

i apologise if this blog looks boring…

-malcolm

… wait..

EPIC FAIL

just for the fucking record, i was dragged to watch this upon my return to singapore by my sisters… it was a shite movie.. honestly, 4 sluts in the city.. why is it such a big hit? because WOMEN think its all about the 4 of them taking control of their lives.. “ooh feminism this and feminism that”… clearly their lives are being controled by men.. looking for happiness? more like hunting for cock..

you have this jew family who have been fucking for like 4 years and still can’t get a kid.. how ironic is it when they adopt, they all of a sudden have a baby?

and samantha? that woman is as loose as jeans on a weight loss commercial.. honestly, she’s 50 and still fucking around.. she better settle down soon, not every guy digs a granny..

mirranda is just dumb as a box of hair.. with a muff like cecilia chung? absolute grossness… and besides, keeping a bever like that will more or less seal your fate that your husband will fuck someone else! unless he’s edison chen… and come on, no sex for 6 months? i’m in a LDR and even i have sex more often than that..

carrie.. where do i start.. she was ugly as shit in the movie.. she was more ripped than samantha’s bf.. her hands were all old and veiny.. her skin was hanging off her bones and she looked like a heroin addict on speed.. there was the scene where she got to mexico, she looked like she had pink eye or some shit..

long story short, this movie blows… there’s no substance to it.. more like the female version of RUNAWAY BRIDE. it was crap, cheesy and corny.. oh did i mention crap? 4 sluts in the city… they should make it a reality tv series.. they’ll definately make more money than the shit that they have now…

heh heh, i’m gonna get so much hate mail.. i hope i do.. its gonna be zzz if i don’t…

-Malness

home? really?

ahh… singapore…

not much to say about this tiny little shit hole.. the only way i can describe this place is an island of shit being boiled in a pot of water… its hot and it smells here… suddenly, there are so many ugly people roaming the streets too… jesus… this country is going to shit. just yesterday while i was getting my sim card done in plaza singapura, it was swarming with uglyness…

i’m not brilliant looking but holy shit.. must have been the inflow of ROC ugliness… everywhere i turned it was some ugly ass woman in tight white or neon yellow pants with a sleeveless collar shirt topped off with a visor… fuckin hell man.. its disgusting… not tomention fat:(…

well, on a happier note, i just got my girlfriend something nice which i hope she will appreciate or else i’m just gonna have to take it back and sell it off… paid a bit out of budget but its ok.. love knows no price hehehe…

well, i went to see my grandma yesterday too.. was shocked to learn she was actually 94… i’m surprised my dad wasn’t like retarded or some shit when he was born coz my grandma would be like 40 when she gave birth to him.. god.. well, spent the best part of the visit just holding her hand and talking to her.. she fell asleep and i just hung around till my sister started complaining that she needed to go home and sleep..

all in all, i still hate this country i’m forced to call home.. its gay, its boiling and it sucks… i wanna go back to cold cold aussie… only in dec i’ll contemplate on coming back.. it’ll be hot and dry in melb.. last year was bad enough… I NEED TO INSTALL AIRCON!

more posts and maybe pics coming up soon? hang around…

-Malness

Lost in tr4n51a+i0N?

anyways… same old shit today..

woke up this morning at like 11.55.. and was like all alone in the house for the first time in a long time… friends left a post it on my TV… of all places.. put it on my glasses or soemthing.. well better than the time lionel and cheryl post it my entire house.. under every plate, inside every cupboard.

besides that… i have a question.. how smart do you have to be to work in Mc donweldz? stupid woman can’t take a proper order… i was making an order and i said “hoi… can i have 2 double cheese burgerz? and one 6 piece nuggets?”

well, everything seemed in order, till i got the bag of food back… and to my surprise, there was this cookie sized piece of burger in the bag next to a box.. i was like .. meh? wtf.. went back to the counter and said.. “hey! i said 2 double cheese burgers!” and the bitch looks at me with that stupid face and said “yes yes! thats the order! 2 dollar cheese burger!” dumb brainless woman… if you don’t speak the language, get the fuck out of the country! jeezuz…

oh well… going back to singapore soon… tomorrow evening to be precise.. friends in singapore, ya can’t call me just yet.. need to get a new sim card because it got fucking lost when i lost my wallet sadness…

baby? i’m coming back to see you too ok? gonna take you away for a nice holiday.. love you!

love you guys too..
chill the fuck out..

-Malcolm

Charging…. Charging…. CLEAR!!! *Bfft…

Jump starting up my life..

So anyways… I decided to start up my blog again.. Its not on Xangacockgaystupid anymore.. That program is seriously homosexual…

Speaking of homosexual, a few months back, my god bros Daniel V and Aaron were talking about freddie coming out of the closet.. It seemed scary at first, but then i so fucking saw that coming.. Besides, i knew that if we all treated him that way, he would be a fagzorz.. if you guys want the document, just let me know on MSN!

Hey Homo-Freddo! heard you’ve been talking shit about me eh? here’s a pic just for you my gender confused friend. If South Park was real life, he would be butters…

Beautiful ain’t it?

Ok ok.. let me reintroduce myself… I’m Malcolm.. I race, I rave, I rant, I resolve…

I can’t drink, but i can drive. I help my friends when they most need me.. Namely to help them home when they’re drunk.. No names mentioned… You know who you are.. I’ve got a girlfriend! Who you’ll see in the coming blog posts.

I have a bunch of close friends here in Melbourne. Group of brothers if you will.. names have been changed to protect the identity of these people. their photos have been taken at almost drunk state to get the LULZ effect.

Jun Tau

The Lifeline of the brotherhood. He is the most moral of us all and has the most hystarical laughter.

Trivia Time! Jun Tau is known to have a liking of Singaporean women.

Ohmz

Also another of the moral ones. Ohmz likes to club and mingle with people. Friendly as hell, smokes like hell.. Ohmz will get your back no matter what. No gay pun intended.

Trivia Time! Ohmz is known to pick up women as easily as picking dog shit.

Indo

Indo likes to get drunk. Indo also likes to get high. High on life, high on alcohol, its all the same. Bad with women when sober, amazing pulling skills when drunk. Indo makes a good friend with his knowledge of random audio visual artefacts and ranting. Indo cannot do back flips.

Trivia Time! Indo likes his women like his food… spicy.

SharkFace

SharkFace is the most random and crazy one of the lot. He can start a fire in the living room if he was allowed to.. in fact, i think its been done before. Sharkface is also the most violent. Sleepy days might be counterattacked by violent headlocks from nowhere and also everyone keeps a good 3 meters away from him for fear of getting hurt.

Trivia Time! SharkFace is a codependant creature. SharkFace enjoys long lasting relationships and long walks in the park blah blah blah… was recently on a dole without a mate. Ladies! this is your chance!

Hongkie

Hongkie is a heart breaker. Woman eater. He is also a nice brother to hang around. Helps all the time and is very grateful to everyone who does him kindness. Hongkie has no temper. Kind as hell, generous as fuck as well. Hongkie likes to laugh. Hongkie does not like the black mamba.

Trivia Time! Hongkie is from Hong Kong!

Malness

Thats me. I’ve chosen this picture because just in case you faggots say “ooo.. Mal put up a shit picture of us…” i can say “fuck you! i put shit piks of myself too!”

Anyways, Malness.. Malness has a gf.. Malness is the only one who is hitched at the moment. We can’t count Penang Boy because seeing a girl for 2 weeks and getting a dog together is not what i call a relationship. and besides, he hasn’t gone through the proper procedure of becoming a brother yet. Malness likes laughing at unfortunate events.

Malness also has a sick sense of humor but he shares the joy with others! Malness does alot of the paper work. Rose Garden Appreciation group mostly. Malness also helps everyone in their drunken hours. Mainly because Malness cannot get drunk… Because Malness doesn’t drink.

Trivia Time! Malness is fat…

Well, thats all of us i guess… more to come soon…

PS: sorry SharkFace.. I don’t have a recent photo of you alone so i had to use the one with Charkoal Mastar behind you..

-Malness